The daily digest of Twin Cities culture | Secrets of the City

Everyone knows: Wally's Pet World sells the sickest, the oldest, and the mangiest animals. But that doesn't stop George from heading nine counties and eleven hours toward some strip mall into Graysville. He drums a folded bag on his lap with his fingers. The car deviates toward the right side of the crooked road.

"Look, Honey, can you believe this? A five percent discount on anything you can fit into this bag."

Crotches are rarely sniffed or nuzzled within the first five minutes of a first date, yet even with ten first dates occurring simultaneously in a crowded Warehouse District coffee shop, this was no ordinary dating scenario. The distracting backdrop of panting, whining, pawing, and the occasional licking of naughty bits, in fact, might evoke thoughts of Roman orgies, or at least fond memories of a certain notorious Viking-laden pleasure cruise.

Things are getting back to normal now. The collapse of the bridge was two months ago, and except for the families of the dead and injured, we Minnesotans have moved on. The Legislature had its special session and funds were approved for southeastern Minnesota flood relief, but the gas tax is where it was before the bridge fell, and the roads continue to deteriorate.

May you be forgiven.