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Eventful barely begins to describe the year that was 2008. There was, of course, the ongoing fiction that Minnesota was ever a battleground state during the presidential election, and the RNC taking place in Minneapolis, er...Saint Paul. But even stripping away the millions of dollars and the monstrous steaming piles of carefully worded bullscheiss funneled into the state and strewn across the landscape like so many cow pies by the national politicos leaves us with a startling patchwork of transcendence and frustration on the local political scene. And with the new year soon to fall upon us, bringing with it fear of the bogeymen still lurking in our economy and hopes that Barack Obama will ride in on his unicorn whilst farting cinnamon-scented rainbows to rescue us all from our economic doldrums, it seems an opportune time to explore the top highs and lows of the last 365 days.

So, without further ado, today brings us the top five lowest moments in Minnesota politics of 2008:

5) The ongoing politicization of the 35W bridge collapse - Despite promises to the contrary, everyone from Jim Oberstar to Margaret Kelliher and every commentator, pundit, analyst and gibbering undead beast from Lake Minnetonka repeatedly sought to leverage the bridge collapse for political gain - whether blaming Gov. Tim Pawlenty's admittedly incompetent MnDOT leadership for the collapse or attempting to cover themselves in glory for their actions during the aftermath. Had inspections noted the need for repairs? Yes. But bottom line - no one, even armed with photos showing that the much-vilified gusset plates were bending, could've expected that some long-since retired civil engineer's poor math skills would result in 13 deaths on a warm August evening in 2007.

4) The 2008 race for the Senate - Everyone knew it would be a circus. But no one could've predicted a spectacle in which the knife thrower would impale the fat lady, the dancing bear would horribly maul the trapeze artist and, in a spectacular demonstration of flexibility and fortitude, the contortionist would be impregnated by the elephant. Time after time the campaigns would offer up information that, while painting a cohesive picture of a corrupt candidate and another unready for higher office, drowned out any semblance of real debate over the issues. And simply put - in a rapidly devolving economy, the voters just didn't care that Al Franken's brand of humor was inappropriate for virgin ears or that Norm Coleman is the creature that lives (rent free) in the basement.

3) Michelle Bachmann - How much more can we say about the honorable Representative from District 6 who was recently named by Esquire magazine as one of the worst in Congress, among several other dubious distinctions (.pdf)? Reelected by a healthy margin and keeping relatively quiet except apart from her endorsement of traditional trickle-down economics approaches to the recession since her win over El Tinklenberg, Bachmann had little success at passing legislation, but managed to make many Minnesotans cringe more than they had since Gov. Ventura's foray into the XFL and dreams of reincarnation as a piece of particularly sturdy lingerie. Whether calling for McCarthy-esque investigations into the anti-American activities of liberals, declaring jihad against compact fluorescent bulbs, or supporting her husband as he seeks to cure the gay, Rep. Bachmann does her office little credit. And while many Minnesotans from outside the district wonder if she was forced to make a pact with dark powers beyond the ken of modern man to secure reelection, opinion polls and interviews within District 6 make what seems to be an embarrassing truth even more likely - she's exactly what the majority of her constituents were looking for.

2) The Override Six - While it's understandable that a premium is placed on party unity, especially when the party is in the minority, the reaction to Reps. Neil Peterson, Kathy Tingelstad, Bud Heidegerken, Ron Erhardt, Rod Hamilton and Jim Abeler's help in overriding the governor's veto of the gas tax increase was over the top. For their decision to do what they believed best for their district, rather than for their party, they were vilified. Rather than keeping the internal friction to the backrooms and hallways, their party publicly announced the six would not have access to various resources and that the party would do what it could to ensure the defeat of these RINOs. And they were true to their word. Tingelstad and Heidegerken both retired, likely under pressure. Erhardt ran as an independent after nine terms as a Republican in the face of constant calls for his manhood in a Zip-Loc bag. Abeler won by a landslide despite his party endorsing no one in the race, and Hamilton, after much contrition, managed to retain the GOP endorsement and went on to win his race.

Sadly, all this teaches us is that the Minnesota GOP, in true frat boy fashion, maintains a "bros before hos" mentality. And in case it wasn't clear - we're the hos.

1) $5.2 billion deficit - While it's peanuts compared to New York's $15.4 billion deficit or California's $18 billion deficit, to us it's a nigh-insurmountable peak set to crumble down atop our vaunted Minnesota lifestyle. Already our cities are feeling the pinch. Minneapolis and Saint Paul have to address a total of $18.7 million in cuts to their budgets to finish out the fiscal year as a result of the state withholding local government aid payments. That's a 20 percent budget cut to all departments across the board in Saint Paul and Minneapolis will likely target fire and police budgets now that a citywide hiring freeze has been proposed. And that's just the tip of the proverbial iceberg.

The next session will likely feature a ridiculously contentious debate on how to bridge the gap on the $4.8 billion remaining, potentially reducing local government aid even further, slashing state social services, delaying projects like light rail and pitting Gov. Pawlenty's no new taxes ideology against the services and style of government Minnesota is known for. Make no mistake, the politely worded statements about all options being on the table will be a thing of the past once negotiations begin. It's going to be a Jets on Sharks style rumble, featuring Marty Seifert, Tim Pawlenty, Tony Sertich and Larry Pogemiller. Much to the dismay of the average Minnesotan - in 2009 it's on.

And for those of you hoping for a more uplifting start to 2009, look for a more positive light to shine on 2008 on New Year's Day, when The Defenestrator recaps the highlights of the year in politics.