The daily digest of Twin Cities culture | Secrets of the City

Related Content

• The Devil Wears Nada

True story.

Back in the mid-90's, my friend M. got married. I didn't much like the guy -- he was shifty and weird -- and for his bachelor party, his "friends" took him to a club downtown, where an exotic dancer slid her way across the bar, presented her spangled G-string to accept his $100 bill, and whispered in his ear that he was the hottest guy there (I assure you, he was not). Why do I know this? Because he was so proud he told everyone, including his wife-to-be.

A year later, M. noticed money was disappearing from their joint accounts. I mean pouring out. At first, she thought her husband had a drug habit. No. He was back at that joint where the dancer -- Trudy, he knew her quite well by now -- would tell him almost nightly what a studly man he was. It helped him feel confident, he explained to M. The attention he received from Trudy was good for their married sex life, he insisted.

Now, imagine if he'd been able to say, "Honey, I'm only going for the food -- this place has the most amazing steaks. Why don't you come with me next time? You'll love their Cobb Salad." M. and her husband might still be married today!

Someone finally caught on to this; the day when you can get a lap dance along with a juicy sirloin has arrived. Just as Playboy runs breakthrough interviews and short stories by the likes of Joyce Carol Oates among the cheesecake photos of women touching one another in forbidden places, savvy upscale adult entertainment purveyors, such as the Penthouse in Manhattan, are incorporating haute cuisine. Locally, Schiek's Palace Royale -- easily the classiest, most upscale strip club in town -- is opening a high-end restaurant called The Kitchen, where restaurant owner Mike Stone promises to serve steaks on par with Manny's and seafood akin to that at Oceanaire.

"Our clientele is upper middle-class and higher," Stone says. "They're spending $15 on a single cocktail. Weekdays, we get mostly business travelers with corporate American Express cards. These are people who can afford really good food."

For years, Schiek's has allowed customers to bring food in from downtown restaurants, then charged $20 to $50 (depending, Vegas-style, on how "good" the customer who was asking) to heat and plate it. But when new owners took over recently -- VCG Holdings, a group out of Denver that has more than 20 high-end gentlemen's clubs throughout the U.S. -- they decided it made more sense to keep, um, satisfied patrons right on-site. So they approached Stone, the man behind Stone's Restaurant and Lounge in Stillwater, and asked him to be their Minneapolis partner.

Stone recruited chef Stephanie Hedrick, formerly of The Independent and Pi Bar and Restaurant, to oversee the kitchen. And what a smart move! Because according to stats compiled by Schiek's, FORTY PERCENT of their customer base is made up of couples. And not just curiosity-seekers; these are men and women who return, together, over and over again.

Hedrick has put together a menu of upscale American classics, with a heavy focus on steak (a 42-ounce Porterhouse, Kobe beef hamburgers, thick-cut pork chops), grilled fish and seafood, hefty dinner salads, and big shareable desserts. Something for everyone.

"Look, I have no delusions," Stone says. "We're never going to be a great destination restaurant that happens to have adult entertainment. We're always going to be a premier gentlemen's club that serves dinner. But the food component has many elements, and one of them is enablement. If someone really wants to go to the strip club and check it out, they can say, 'Hey, I read about this goofy restaurant at Schiek's that's supposed to have great steaks. Let's give it a try.'"

The Kitchen will open for business November 2. Call 612-341-0054 for a reservation.